From Trash to Treasure.

            One of the reasons I started writing this column was because I was feeling a need to personally explore and then share my thoughts and life’s story with my adopted community. I’m starting to feel old, and yes I know I’m only 53 but in my minds eye I’m still 16 and when I was actually that age, 53 seemed ancient. I also sometimes feel insignificant, I mean on a grand scale I’m only 1 of almost 7 billion people on earth and on an even grander scale I’m only 1 of over 110 billion people who have lived since the beginning of civilization. I’m sure more than a few of those people have contributed to the betterment of their fellow men. On a smaller more local scale, I look around at my friends and neighbors and I see parents, teachers, farmers, doctors, researchers, safety personnel, musicians, artists, and the list goes on and on. All these people seem to make some kind of difference but I wonder about me, what have I done? I haven’t raised any kids, taught anyone, cured any diseases, or created any music or art. In my ancient 53 years on this earth have I made a difference? I can’t say for sure but I hope maybe a little, so let’s see.

            Shortly after Diane and I opened our first Steady Eddy’s Café in Michigan we were shorthanded and looking to hire some more help. We had a young woman working for us who had a neighbor that lived in the same trailer park and was looking for work so I agreed to interview her.            Melody, or Mel for short showed up for the interview with a couple of her kids in tow, she had them go sit in a booth while we talked. At that moment, in my mind, Mel was the classic stereotype (and there’s no P.C. way to say it) of “White Trash.” She was barely 30 with a teenage daughter, overweight, was loud, smelled of cigarettes, and hadn’t worked in years. I eventually learned that her life was actually the complete stereotype. She lived in an old trailer with an alcoholic husband who treated her like crap and that’s why she wanted and needed a job. She was pleasant enough during the interview and promised to work hard if I hired her; I was desperate so I did.

            As you can imagine, Mel’s life had beat her down pretty good, she had low self esteem and not a lot of confidence. Right off the bat Mel was the hardest worker I had ever seen. She was willing to do any job, showed up to work on time, and was truly happy to be there. Steady Eddy’s was her sanctuary, her escape from life. The more she worked and interacted with the customers, the more her confidence grew. The more confident she became the more she started thinking about her personal issues and wanting to change them. She lost weight, quit smoking, and started trying to figure out what to do about her relationship. Diane and I were always supportive when she complained about how her husband treated her and we told her she didn’t have to take it. Eventually she got strong enough to kick him out and file for divorce.

            By this time Mel had become my most valued and trusted employee. She was still loud and drove me a little crazy but I was glad she was there. We had opened a second restaurant at the Flint Farmers Market and then sold the first one. At the farmers market Mel blossomed even more and everyone there loved her. While working at the market she started dating one of the farmers who had an apple orchard and eventually married him. In the meantime Diane and I sold the café and left Mel behind. She stayed working with the new owners for a while but once she got married she became a farmer’s wife and that meant a full time job at the orchard and baking pies for the market.

            Since Diane and I moved to California we only talked to her every couple of years but I know her life is still good and a hell of a lot better than when we meet her. So when I start feeling insignificant and sorry for myself I think about Melody and how I did help change some ones life for the better. I may not have set out to help anyone and in fact it was originally self serving but if I’ve learned anything it’s that if you treat people with kindness and respect the odds are better than 1 in 6.9 billion that you will make a difference, and you can’t hope for anything more.


To view the column in it's original form go to page 13 of the following link. Winters Express 4/7/11